Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Ebola And You (Also, Lions)

I still feel like death warmed over, and now I seem to have pinched a nerve in my shoulder to add insult to injury. Good times. 

I tend to spend a lot of time looking at cute animal pictures when I’m feeling badly — okay, I look at them all the time — so when I came across this one, I had to share it. Guys, remember that there is more to Africa than Ebola. Ebola is a disease. Diseases do not have nationalities. African Lions, on the other hand, do. Look, pretty lions!

Traffic in the Nairobi National Park in Kenya was halted for ten minutes while these two sweeties head-butted and rolled around in the middle of the road. 

Okay, back to Ebola. You cannot catch Ebola if you are walking down a crowded street, and someone in the crowd has Ebola. You cannot catch Ebola if you go to Starbucks and the guy who sat in your chair an hour ago had Ebola. 

Ways you can catch Ebola:
- coming into contact with The Icky Ps (by that, I mean puke, poop, pee, and phlegm). One of the aforementioned must come into contact with an open wound or mucus membrane — eyes, nose, mouth.
- droplet aspiration (This means if someone coughs or sneezes directly into your mouth, you could catch it. It does not mean if someone sneezes six tables away from you that you should panic. It’s flu season, guys).
- blood — self-explanatory.
- bow chika wow wow. People! Do not swap spit or otherwise get your freak on with someone you suspect could have been exposed to Ebola, and you will be safe from it. I make no promises in terms of other yucky things. 

Chill out. This is not Contagion or The Walking Dead. The number of people to die from Ebola in the United States? One. Around five thousand have died in Africa. Get your damn flu shots. The flu kills almost forty thousand people every year in the United States alone. 

Flu shots! Get them!

(Source: my uncle is a pathologist, and a friend works at the CDC).

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